"I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord, "plans to give you a hope and a future."

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Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.

Some choose to remain silent and not talk about their loss and I think that is just fine and some choose to frequently talk about their loss, to blog about it, to facebook it, to tattoo their baby's name or due dates on their body.

We had already announced our pregnancy and had shared photos of us surprising our family on Christmas Day.  Since our pregnancy was public so was our loss.  But we are so grateful for the outpouring of love we received, the cards, the well wishes, the Bible verses, the flowers, and the prayers!

People choose to grieve or to remember in many different ways.

We don't really need a day to remember our loss as we remember all the time.  But it sure is nice to have a day to remember we are not alone.

To all who have lost a pregnancy, had a still birth, or lost an infant, you aren't alone.  Many will choose to light a candle between the hours of 7-8 tonight.  We usually do not. 

Here is an interesting article about today. 

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Monday, September 9, 2013

School School School

After a busy and fun filled summer the kids had their first week of school last week and have entered into the second week today.

So far so good!

Emma likes her 1st grade teacher and is doing really well.  I think she tends to respond better to other people teaching her than her own mother!  She is reading and doing more math than I thought she could do.  She always tells me she doesn't know how to read but this momma caught her reading!  Stinker.  She is still always on the go and never stops.  As soon as her head hits the pillow it's light out.  If you don't hurry to say good night then she will be asleep before you get there to tuck her in.

Katelyn is 19 months and a busy bee.  She is not thrilled that her brother and sister are now in school.  She is absolutely in love with Mickey and Minnie Mouse and now has taken a liking to Dora.  We call her the hoarder because she likes to walk around the house with her arms absolutely full of toys!  I stopped nursing her at 18 months.  I am not weird.  I am not insane.  :)  But it was time for us to end it.  She is a easy going baby (Toddler: ahhh) and a true joy to be around. 

Nathan has done great at school!  He loves his teacher and he really thrives on the set schedule.  He acts like a movie star waving and talking to all the teachers and staff and knows their names and room numbers.  He is excited that this year might be harder for him.  His teacher is talking about getting him into the gifted program this year.  He will continue to do PT 2 times in a 6 day cycle and he will also see the school psychiatrist 2 times in a 6 day cycle which is actually more than last year.

The mornings and nights are cooling off and it seems like fall is already in the air!  I love this cooler weather.  Time sure passes fast with kids.  They are growing up very fast. 

Time for homework! 

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Nathan's 504 for the coming year

I am finally getting around to updating about Nathan's 504.  It actually means a lot that a few people have asked me to update and let them know how things went.  Thanks to all who prayed!

First we got a great report from Nathan's Physical Therapist.  She said Nathan went through a slump where he refused to do anything, said he couldn't do it, it was too hard, and would just give up.  This must have been when we got the report that was less than stellar and I found to be very discouraging.  Let me also make it clear that I have no desire for my son to become some super star athlete and that we are beyond grateful for what he can do.  We look at him receiving PT (physical therapy) as a way to help better him in a few areas that are lacking. So please don't ever think we are complaining.  We are glad Nathan can walk and run!  Anything after that is icing on the cake.

Anyways, his therapist said she was considering contacting me and telling me Nathan wasn't cooperating and she wasn't sure what to do.  That he had given up but then something changed.  She said Nathan began to doing what he was supposed to do and even trying hard to do it for longer than his goal time!  His last report was glowing!  He has met many of his goals. 

In the coming school year he still qualifies for PT.  They will work on environmental awareness: not tripping over objects, paying attention to his surroundings, and things such as that.  They will work on him catching a ball.  Nathan rarely can catch a ball that is thrown to him.  They will work on his kicking a ball that has been rolled to him.  He can't kick it if it's rolling.  His timing is too off.  These may seem like minor goals but the real point of these goals is a focus on Nathan's motor skills which are lacking. 

Nathan will meet the with school Psychologist once every 6 days.  They will focus less on not interrupting and taking control of the class and more on the aspects of friendships and what being a  friend means. 

They are also considering the use of noise canceling headphones during loud times at school.  Nathan has been very stressed this year when there have been assemblies, loud  lunches, and too much noise in his classroom.  Strict guidelines will be put in place for use of the headphone due to Nathan's obsessive personality. 

So that's about it for his 504.  We have more paperwork, more things to sign, and we are grateful for all of it!

Emma did very well for her kindergarten year.  She was sad to leave her teacher and friends but happy about the summer. She has learned to read a little and do some math.

Katelyn has hit the terrible 2's even though she's only 16 months old.  She goes from happy to crying in 2 seconds flat!  The words "no" really makes her angry! 

This week at church we are doing a VBS.  The first day was yesterday and we had a great turn out.  Nathan has made friends with a boy from his school and it's nice to hear the two of them chatting away to each other. 
Some of the neighborhood boys have "disappeared" and don't come around anymore.  It's difficult for Nathan to keep the friends he makes. 

Chris and I notice more things are definitely to do with Nathan's Asperger's and his way of thinking than just typical 7 yr old boy thinking.  I won't go into details but Nathan pitched an absolute fit the other day because the kids weren't playing the way he wanted them to play.  He wanted them to stop their game and play his game and when they said no he lost it.  It's time like these I wish there was more understanding because Chris and I both tried to reason with him and make him understand but he would not and could it.  It's during times like these his Asperger's is more apparent.  It's just a funny way of thinking he has. 

Chris said he recently heard  someone say that kids with Autism and Aspergers are just disobedient kids needing discipline.  We couldn't disagree more.  We know when Nathan is just being a naughty seven year old and needs to be disciplined and believe me he gets put in the corner and has things taken away.  We never let him use his Aspergers as an excuse to be bad.  But we also know when he is reacting as a child with Aspergers to something.  When a tantrum is "not normal" but we also don't let him get too rude or wild.  There is a limit.  If he needs to go to his room and shout and scream because he's angry or upset or something didn't go the way he pre-planned then he is allowed but only before for so long.  After a while we make sure he  knows enough is enough.

We are human.  We get frustrated.  We get perplexed.
 And above all
We are

So here comes summer.  Here comes fun.  Here comes pool days, lazy days, beach, zoo, and friends.  And for us here comes drama, tears, and misunderstandings and trying to get Nathan to make and keep friends and not chase them away.  And lot so  pre-planning and notification about what we will do in a day to keep his stress level down.
We pray for wisdom in parenting all our children.  We are grateful for each of them.  Nathan and Emma have both now asked the Lord Jesus into their hearts. We pray now it was true and we will see the "fruit" or proof of that in their lives.
I am amazed I wrote all this in one sitting but Katelyn's telling me enough is enough and I think she's right!  :)


Thursday, May 2, 2013

"But they don't want to play with you..."

It's been a long time since I've updated but with the three kids, and lots of neighborhood friends and other happenings I have not taken the time to sit down and write an update!  So here goes!

Nathan is doing so well!  He is almost done with first grade.  He does complain it's too easy and he gets bored but still he is doing well.  He seems to be getting along with most of the kids at school and has made several friends.  He sort of has had a bit of a fall back when it comes to physical therapy.  This last report was not as good as his reports have been.  His main areas that he lacks in are coordination and balance.  He can't throw a ball the way a boy his age should and he can't seem to kick a rolling ball and his balance is not so good. 

But we have had victories!  Nathan is riding a bike!  This is huge!  Nathan could not ride a traditional bike.  He was not able to balance, pedal, and steer.  It was too much to do with his lack of motor skills.  But I found a really cool tricycle and now he is zipping around and so proud of himself!  So no, it's not an official bike but this proud momma doesn't care!  Close enough! 

Nathan's progress in the last few years is such that many say they can't even tell he has Aspergers anymore.  That is great but trust me... he has it.  :)  I am glad people "can't tell" but believe me if you were with him all the time you would notice.  Just recently he was playing with two boys in the yard and after yelling at them about rules and changing the rules and then threatening to "tell" on them they kids decided they'd had enough and left.  Nathan then came and asked me if he could go to their yard!
I explained that the boys left because they didn't like the way he was playing.  His reply, "Right, so I will go to their yard."  I again explained nicely they left because they didn't like the way he was playing and that he was being a little mean.  His reply?  "I know so I will go play with them in their yard."
My reply, "Nathan, you don't understand that they don't want to play with you."
He thought this over and replied, "That's why I will go to their yard."
So yes, he is smart and lovable but social things don't make much sense to him. 
He brought me a fake flower from school and he said, "Everyone threw theirs out but I gave mine to you."
I said, Oh Nathan!  Thank you for thinking of me!  How sweet.  I love it!  So nice for you to think of your mommy."
Nathan said, "Yeah well, I wasn't thinking about you.  I didn't know what to do with it so I gave it to you."  Ha ha!  Oh well!
He has been more affectionate lately.  I'm getting more hugs which is so nice!
Nathan's new obsession is chess.  He talks about it, plays it on his phone, plays it at Chess club, and plays it with a glass chess set. 
Another victory is has been a little more affectionate to me lately.   He especially enjoys texting my mom and he seems to really open up with her and tell her how he feels. 
Lately he has been doing this strange clap in his sisters face and I have asked him repeatedly to stop and finally I said, "Why do you keep doing that when I asked you to stop?"
He surprised me by saying, "I know I am not supposed to but I can't help it.  My Aspergers makes me do it."
Now whether or not that is true or he was trying to get out of a punishment I don't know but he has never said something like that before. 
Emma Grace is five and turning six this summer.  She is spirited and strong willed and loves to dance and sing. 
Emma loves to be a little mommy to Katelyn and Katelyn even calls Emma "Em Mom" sometimes. Ha ha!  She is helpful and imaginative.  She doesn't watch much TV.  She'd rather play with her toys, her friends, or go outside.  She is always on the go and sometimes she reminds me so much of myself when I was her age. 
Katelyn is 14 months old now!  That is crazy!  I remember when I could hold her with one hand because she was so small.  Now she is on the go.  She loves yogurt, she loves when her  brother and sister come home from school and she loves any visitors!  She is definitely a very social baby.  She listens very well and seems bright for her age.  She responds to most things we say and surprises us at how much she understands.  Her obsession is Mickey Mouse.  She likes to watch a Mickey show every morning while I have my coffee.  She is definitely a joy even when teething makes her cranky.

 Me?  I still love to cook and bake.  Though lately I am trying to be a little more careful and get rid of the rest of this baby weight!  I haven't had much time to write.  This blog alone has taken me 2 days to write and several sessions. But when I saw someone "liked" my blog on Pinterest I thought I'd better update it!   I still teach Sunday school and our yard always seems filled with children.  This has given us the opportunity to take a couple of these kids to church with us.

Lately I feel like I have really fallen into motherhood.  I know... Nathan is 7 and so by now I should have already done this right?  But now I feel like I am a more confidant mother.  I trust my instincts, I am not afraid of a little crying when Katelyn is trying to soothe herself to sleep.  I feel like I am enjoying being a mother now more than ever. 

I am striving hard to enjoy every moment and understanding I can't really enjoy ALL the moments.  I love to be a mom but I don't love the dirty diapers and the crying.  I don't love teething and I don't look foward to potty trainging another child.  But I really have fallen into motherhood....finally.. ha ha! 

I am still nursing Katelyn in the morning and at night.  Some days I say, "Ok, she is too old and I am done with this.  I don't want to nurse anymore."  Other days I say, "Well, it's good for her, helps me burn calories, and soothes her when she is so upset so why not a little longer?"  I feel like society in general thinks it's weird to breastfeed and even weirder to breastfeed after 12 months but I don't care.  With Nathan and Emma I would have cared.  I would have scoured the internet and asked friends and doctors but now I am more confidant in my skills as a mom. 

I am not a supermom.  I end many of my days going to bed at 9:30 exhausted!  I lose my patience and I sometimes I yell.  But I am trying, like all us moms, to do this right thing. 

Chris is doing well and busier than ever at work.  It's nice to have him work from home.  I make him his  lunch and tea and I enjoy having sometime to talk to when he comes up for his lunch. 

I think that is enough of an update!  I will try harder to keep this blog updated but some days...  :)