School School School

After a busy and fun filled summer the kids had their first week of school last week and have entered into the second week today.

So far so good!

Emma likes her 1st grade teacher and is doing really well.  I think she tends to respond better to other people teaching her than her own mother!  She is reading and doing more math than I thought she could do.  She always tells me she doesn't know how to read but this momma caught her reading!  Stinker.  She is still always on the go and never stops.  As soon as her head hits the pillow it's light out.  If you don't hurry to say good night then she will be asleep before you get there to tuck her in.

Katelyn is 19 months and a busy bee.  She is not thrilled that her brother and sister are now in school.  She is absolutely in love with Mickey and Minnie Mouse and now has taken a liking to Dora.  We call her the hoarder because she likes to walk around the house with her arms absolutely full of toys!  I stopped nursing her at 18 months.  I am not weird.  I am not insane.  :)  But it was time for us to end it.  She is a easy going baby (Toddler: ahhh) and a true joy to be around. 

Nathan has done great at school!  He loves his teacher and he really thrives on the set schedule.  He acts like a movie star waving and talking to all the teachers and staff and knows their names and room numbers.  He is excited that this year might be harder for him.  His teacher is talking about getting him into the gifted program this year.  He will continue to do PT 2 times in a 6 day cycle and he will also see the school psychiatrist 2 times in a 6 day cycle which is actually more than last year.

The mornings and nights are cooling off and it seems like fall is already in the air!  I love this cooler weather.  Time sure passes fast with kids.  They are growing up very fast. 

Time for homework! 

"But they don't want to play with you..."

It's been a long time since I've updated but with the three kids, and lots of neighborhood friends and other happenings I have not taken the time to sit down and write an update!  So here goes!

Nathan is doing so well!  He is almost done with first grade.  He does complain it's too easy and he gets bored but still he is doing well.  He seems to be getting along with most of the kids at school and has made several friends.  He sort of has had a bit of a fall back when it comes to physical therapy.  This last report was not as good as his reports have been.  His main areas that he lacks in are coordination and balance.  He can't throw a ball the way a boy his age should and he can't seem to kick a rolling ball and his balance is not so good. 

But we have had victories!  Nathan is riding a bike!  This is huge!  Nathan could not ride a traditional bike.  He was not able to balance, pedal, and steer.  It was too much to do with his lack of motor skills.  But I found a really cool tricycle and now he is zipping around and so proud of himself!  So no, it's not an official bike but this proud momma doesn't care!  Close enough! 

 

Nathan's progress in the last few years is such that many say they can't even tell he has Aspergers anymore.  That is great but trust me... he has it.  :)  I am glad people "can't tell" but believe me if you were with him all the time you would notice.  Just recently he was playing with two boys in the yard and after yelling at them about rules and changing the rules and then threatening to "tell" on them they kids decided they'd had enough and left.  Nathan then came and asked me if he could go to their yard!

 

I explained that the boys left because they didn't like the way he was playing.  His reply, "Right, so I will go to their yard."  I again explained nicely they left because they didn't like the way he was playing and that he was being a little mean.  His reply?  "I know so I will go play with them in their yard."

 

My reply, "Nathan, you don't understand that they don't want to play with you."

 

He thought this over and replied, "That's why I will go to their yard."

 

So yes, he is smart and lovable but social things don't make much sense to him. 

 

He brought me a fake flower from school and he said, "Everyone threw theirs out but I gave mine to you."

 

I said, Oh Nathan!  Thank you for thinking of me!  How sweet.  I love it!  So nice for you to think of your mommy."

 

Nathan said, "Yeah well, I wasn't thinking about you.  I didn't know what to do with it so I gave it to you."  Ha ha!  Oh well!

 

He has been more affectionate lately.  I'm getting more hugs which is so nice!

 

Nathan's new obsession is chess.  He talks about it, plays it on his phone, plays it at Chess club, and plays it with a glass chess set. 

 

 

Another victory is has been a little more affectionate to me lately.   He especially enjoys texting my mom and he seems to really open up with her and tell her how he feels. 

 

Lately he has been doing this strange clap in his sisters face and I have asked him repeatedly to stop and finally I said, "Why do you keep doing that when I asked you to stop?"

He surprised me by saying, "I know I am not supposed to but I can't help it.  My Aspergers makes me do it."

Now whether or not that is true or he was trying to get out of a punishment I don't know but he has never said something like that before. 

 

 

Emma Grace is five and turning six this summer.  She is spirited and strong willed and loves to dance and sing. 

 

 

Emma loves to be a little mommy to Katelyn and Katelyn even calls Emma "Em Mom" sometimes. Ha ha!  She is helpful and imaginative.  She doesn't watch much TV.  She'd rather play with her toys, her friends, or go outside.  She is always on the go and sometimes she reminds me so much of myself when I was her age. 

 

Katelyn is 14 months old now!  That is crazy!  I remember when I could hold her with one hand because she was so small.  Now she is on the go.  She loves yogurt, she loves when her  brother and sister come home from school and she loves any visitors!  She is definitely a very social baby.  She listens very well and seems bright for her age.  She responds to most things we say and surprises us at how much she understands.  Her obsession is Mickey Mouse.  She likes to watch a Mickey show every morning while I have my coffee.  She is definitely a joy even when teething makes her cranky.

 



 Me?  I still love to cook and bake.  Though lately I am trying to be a little more careful and get rid of the rest of this baby weight!  I haven't had much time to write.  This blog alone has taken me 2 days to write and several sessions. But when I saw someone "liked" my blog on Pinterest I thought I'd better update it!   I still teach Sunday school and our yard always seems filled with children.  This has given us the opportunity to take a couple of these kids to church with us.

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Lately I feel like I have really fallen into motherhood.  I know... Nathan is 7 and so by now I should have already done this right?  But now I feel like I am a more confidant mother.  I trust my instincts, I am not afraid of a little crying when Katelyn is trying to soothe herself to sleep.  I feel like I am enjoying being a mother now more than ever. 

I am striving hard to enjoy every moment and understanding I can't really enjoy ALL the moments.  I love to be a mom but I don't love the dirty diapers and the crying.  I don't love teething and I don't look foward to potty trainging another child.  But I really have fallen into motherhood....finally.. ha ha! 

I am still nursing Katelyn in the morning and at night.  Some days I say, "Ok, she is too old and I am done with this.  I don't want to nurse anymore."  Other days I say, "Well, it's good for her, helps me burn calories, and soothes her when she is so upset so why not a little longer?"  I feel like society in general thinks it's weird to breastfeed and even weirder to breastfeed after 12 months but I don't care.  With Nathan and Emma I would have cared.  I would have scoured the internet and asked friends and doctors but now I am more confidant in my skills as a mom. 

I am not a supermom.  I end many of my days going to bed at 9:30 exhausted!  I lose my patience and I sometimes I yell.  But I am trying, like all us moms, to do this right thing. 

Chris is doing well and busier than ever at work.  It's nice to have him work from home.  I make him his  lunch and tea and I enjoy having sometime to talk to when he comes up for his lunch. 

I think that is enough of an update!  I will try harder to keep this blog updated but some days...  :)

 



Life Moves Foward

It's been a while since I updated but with the arrival of baby Katelyn I have been pretty busy!

Nathan is going to be done with school on June 7th and I can't wait!  I'm ready to have him home again and do some fun things.  I think he did well in school and though he had some struggles I think overall his first year at school went great.

Emma will be starting school in September and boy I will miss her!  She is feisty and funny and loves to help with Katelyn.

The kids have not been jealous of Katelyn.  They lover her.  She is a really great baby and a true joy to have! 

I sometimes look at her and just start crying.  I call her heartbreakingly beautiful.  Strange I know.....  But I look at her and think of our third baby I will not hold here on a earth and also remember without the loss of our third baby I would not have Katelyn.  She is so beautiful and perfect and I can't imagine NOT having her.  I talked to someone recently who told me they had 3 miscarriages.  I can't imagine.  One was beyond hard.... but three? 

Friday we meet with the school psychologist, occupational therapist, physical therapist, and I believe Nathan's teacher for next year.  I am not 100% clear on what we will discuss but I guess we will find out!  Pray for wisdom that we will know what to ask, what to say, and that Nathan will get what he needs. 

So life moves forward.  I am loving this season of my life.  It's busy and exhausting and hectic and sometimes we get dressed out of a laundry basket because I haven't had time to put it away but I am loving it!! 

Keeping Friends

Nathan is doing very well in school but is definitely struggling lately to maintain friendships.  I know this problem is common in kids with Aspergers but it doesn't mean I have to like it or even accept it!  We talk with Nathan and try to explain what a friend is and how to keep friends and how to be kind and flexible and so forth but not all of it sinks in. 

I know he has a tendency to overreact when other kids are not doing things "the right way" or "the way you are supposed to" and that can push kids away.  He also doesn't understand when someone says, "I don't want to be your friend anymore."  He finds it an odd statement since nearly everyone is his friend.  It just plain doesn't make sense to him. 

But overall he is doing better than we expected and his teacher says he is participating more and more in group activities and playing with a wider range of playground equipment, colors, etc. 

Little Miss Emma has decided she should be in school and ask everyday when she will get to go.  But I also think she doesn't mind too much being home with mommy and cooking and even getting a bath in the middle of the day!  Not too shabby I say!

I will be 32 weeks pregnant tomorrow! Hard to believe.  I am very uncomfortable at this point but it will all be worth it!

That's it for now!

Physical Therapy

Just a quick update.  Nathan's school finally hired a physical therapist which means as soon as this busy momma gets a chance I can go to Nathan's doctor to pick up his prescription for therapy and then he can start therapy at school.  He already does Occupational Therapy OT, and has made remarkable improvements but his balance and coordination still need work as well as some muscle weakness still present. 

This morning Nathan was in a terrible mood and crying and whining over everything and yelling at his sister and me!  He is supposed to have a play date today after school and I told him if he couldn't control himself I was cancelling.  Just before he got out of the van to go into school he blew me a kiss!  Very unusual for him.  I was just saying the other day how it's a shame he never seems excited to see me after school and doesn't seem to miss me so a blown kiss was special!

Nathan does not like the weekends because he said he would rather just stay at school.  We are happy he loves school so much but we also want him to understand that time with family is important. 

So that's about it for now! 

"He Has Aspergers like you!" "Oh"

Where to start?

Nathan is officially in love with school.  He even boast about having no absences and makes sure to list who in his class has been absent before and how many times.  He knows EVERYONES name in his class and even kids from other classes.  When Chris called the school office about something he said he was calling regarding Nathan and the woman on the phone goes, "Nathan Tidball?  Oh, we know who he is!"  LOL  I bet they do!

Nathan actually does better during the week than on the weekends.  I think during the week he knows exactly what will happen and the schedule at school and he thrives on that!  Whereas our weekends are always different and we go places, run errands, get up later, etc. 

Nathan did report that he doesn't get along well with one girl and I won't go into details but the teacher has been made aware of what was happening and said she will take care of it.  We really like Nathan's teacher. 

We also have been informed that Nathan gets pulled out of class and gets to read to someone.  They said they are doing their best to challenge him.  I do admit we wish he could get into 1st grade for a more challenging education but at the same time I think he does well to be with kids his own age. 

Nathan knows the whole school schedule and what "special" they have every day. 

His first picture day is tomorrow and he said he HAD to have a red background for his picture.  His first field trip is Friday and I get to go with him!  Probably the first and only field trip I can attend since the baby will be here in February. 

We are having Nathan's birthday party early this year, in October.  A little girl from his class lives nearby and she comes and plays in the back yard with Nathan. Anyways, her mom called and said they would like to come to Nathan's party but she hesitated then said, "She has a brother who is nine and he has Aspergers and thinks he should get to go too."

I said, "No problem!  He is welcome!  Nathan has Aspergers too!"

She almost seemed excited and said she would like to talk and know what their options are.  Again, I feel so grateful we caught Nathan's early and he could spend a year at the Early Intervention and attend his social group and OT and PT.

I told Nathan about his friend's brother having Aspergers like him and he just said, "Oh."

Emma is enrolled in ballet.   She loves it!  And she is so cute in her tutu.

I am in my 6th month of pregnancy already.  Time seems to be passing fast.
 

Better Late than Never

Trying to send out a quick update!

Today we meet with Nathan's teacher and then directly afterwards we meet with the school psychologist to get the 504 in place and to discuss the PT and OT Nathan will continue to receive.

Pray that we can talk with his teacher in a way that does not offend.  We have no problems with the Kindergarten curriculum but we want to make it clear that Nathan will need "more" than what might be being offered.  We were sent home a paper of what Nathan must know by the END of the year and he already knows these things. 

We also would like prayer that he will find good friends who are good influences.  Nathan is very much an imitator. 

He officially starts school on Thursday.  I am excited for him but also nervous.  He has never been to daycare, never to a pre-k, and not even in a Sunday nursery.    He's always been mine to watch and care for and now from 9-3:15 I have to trust someone else to do the job I have done for the last five, almost 6 years now. 

On other news I have made it to my 16th week of my pregnancy and it seems to be going well.  I have an appointment on Thursday after I drop Nathan off at school.

Emma is busy doing her thing.  I have told her she needs to work on her letters and numbers this year.  She will start Kindergarten next year and she could care less about numbers and letters. 

Today is also our wedding anniversary.  8 years!

I will apologize in advance for any typo's or spelling errors as I don't really have time to do a good edit. 

The Good, the Bad, the Ugly...well maybe not ugly...

Let's start with the good.  Chris and I are expecting again!  We saw the heart beating when I was 6 weeks 5 Days.  The baby was very tiny but very much there!  We are excited but also nervous.  The Lord has really spoken to my heart these days, telling me to trust Him in all things, to have faith, and to believe.  No matter what happens, be it good or bad, He is in control! Always!

I have not updated much because I have been very tired....and also pretty sick lately.  But I also have not updated because Chris and I got some news that we are still trying to figure out and wrap our heads around.  After having door after door open wide for us with absolute ease we had a door close in our face just as we were about to step through.  We are literally between a rock and a hard place.  No decision we make is a good one or an easy one.

Basically the TSS and the BSC that Nathan was one step away from getting is now just past that door that slammed closed.  Act 64 was a law put into place to help families, there was a good idea behind it, but it is also hurting many families and we happen to be one of them.  Without going into many details we originally were going to get Nathan's services for free but now they will cost us....a big sum.  So we have no good options basically.  We go forward and pay a large sum or we stand still and Nathan does not get the aid to go to school with him. 

We've been told if Nathan has enough behavioral issues the school will then be forced to give him an aid.  But who knows!

In all this, we DO KNOW that the Lord is in control!  He is holding us in His hands and guiding us along every step of the way.  We are disappointed to say the least, we are unsure which way to go, and so we ask that you pray with us for wisdom and guidance in making the right decision. 

Whirlwind Day

Phew! What a day!

Up at 6:45 and out the door at 8:00 only to creep in traffic and arrive at Nathan's social group at 9:00.  Poor Nathan, I forgot his backpack with his home-work in it so he was upset with me.  Emma was mad at me too for forgetting her brother's back pack.  His teacher let me help him fill in an extra homework page she had and that made Nathan happy. 

Then Emma and I went to Aldi's.  We picked up some candy to fill Easter eggs for church. 

Next stop was Wal-mart.  I had a good talk on my cell with a friend who shared some encouraging words about Nathan starting school.  :)  Then back to pick up Nathan.  His class learned about Rude Dude who did not take turns talking and did not listen to his friend.  They made a book about Rude Dude and I am going to make sure we read it with Nathan often!

On the way home we stopped at Nathan's. (That hot dog place)  Nathan has been wanting to eat there since it has name on the sign.  Nathan said, "I bet they have mac n cheese from Sweden"

I said, "Umm, no, they have hot dogs."

Nathan said, "Seriously?"

Ha ha!

Even though they did not have mac-n-cheese from Sweden, Nathan enjoyed his hot dog and so did Emma.

We got home around 12:30.  I opened all the bags of candy I bought and started to fill plastic eggs, with Nathan's help, when we both realized that the big bag of mixed candy I bought contained pieces of candy that were way too big for the little plastic eggs!  Oops!

1:30 We left for Creative Services and met with Lauren.  Nathan and Emma were both very tired.  I met with Lauren and basically recited all the things I have recited over and over to a myriad of people by now.  Then she asked me, "So what are Nathan's strengths?"

And I stopped.

It took me a minute because not one person who has tested Nathan or asked about Nathan in this horrible long process has ever asked me that.  It was so nice to be able to tell her about his good qualities and the wonderful things he can do!  Finally some positive amidst the negative!

Long story short I am VERY, VERY, happy with the way the appointment with.  Nathan will meet with their psychologist.  This will be the third psychologist he will have seen.  And then we can move forward.  Lauren said she believes there will be no problem diagnosing the Aspergers as he seems to be a "typical" case.   And here is where my excitement begins.  If he is diagnosed they can offer us wrap around services and behavior specialist and if needed someone to go to school with him and observe and offer the teacher ways to help Nathan and even help Nathan cope with some of his anxiety!  They will also help Chris and I know how to deal and cope with certain things related to his Aspergers!  Yay!

We stopped at the Farmer's Daughter's Market on the way home because who could drive right by and not stop?  I picked up Nathan's favorite, sesame sticks.

When we got home Nathan was just done.  He went right to his room and closed the door.  When I went to check on him I found him in his bed playing his V Smile game.  I think he needed some down time.  Who can blame him?

Emma said, "I'm so tired I should just watch TV."

I am worn out too!  Now to figure what in the world we will eat for dinner tonight.

Meeting with the School Board Today

Thank goodness for blogs and facebook and e-mail to give a mass update or else I'd be on the phone all day repeating myself! 

This morning, at eight, we met with the school.  The man in charge of Special Ed was there along with the Occupational Therapist (OT), Physical Therapist (PT), and Julie, the school pshychologist. 

The meeting took an hour and a half!  The kids did really well and played with some toys they had for them.  Many of our "fears" were allayed by this meeting. 

I won't go into long details but I'll give you the basic idea of what we came away with. 

Nathan will get some Occupational Therapy that will be Incorporated into his school day.  He will get Physical Therapy because there is concern with his safety on the playground due to a lack of safety and body awareness. 

Again it was expressed that although the psychologist says she has no doubt he has Aspergers she can not give him that educational diagnosis since it does not affect his ability to learn new information and because he is functioning above average academically.  He will have 504 plan in place.  It's a legal document that will follow him through out his schooling since his IEP from Early Intervention will "run out" when he starts school. 

They will the make the teacher aware of some special needs to have plenty of visual cues, being very specific with directions seeing as he is very literal and also the use of fidgets may be used.  Fidgets would be some sort of object such as a stress ball that he can literally fidget with during class to help him stay still.  We think this will be a very good idea. 

They will NOT be letting Nathan skip a grade and after our meeting today we pretty much agree.  In first grade they say he will be expected to do certain things like using scissors and and followng directions with much less help than he would receive in Kindergarten. 

They are worried that he may have a hard time adjusting in the beginning.  It could become a sensory overload suddenly going to school all day with kids he does not know and have to follow directions and not be in control. 

Overall, it will be a big adjustment for him.  And for poor mommy...who I am sure will worry the day away while her "baby" is in school.  :)

One more thing: Tomorrow Nathan has his social group but at two p.m. we are also meeting with Creative Services to start a long process in finally obtaining an official diagnosis!  And sadly I am sure they will kill at least another twenty trees with the paperwork involved! 

Thanks for everyone's care and concern and prayers regarding our family and all the decisions we have to make. 

We love our little boy and Emma too of course!

Rough Waters

Apparently Nathan had a hard day at school today. They said they could tell he was getting more and more agitated and he finally broke down in absolute tears. Poor guy. Apparently the sound of the jingle bells they were playing with was hurting his ears and then some other things happened and it overwhelmed him.

I also had a chance to talk with Nathan's social worker for over half an hour today. It was very informative. I also received the notes from Nathan PT and OT evals. They now want him to get OT and PT once a week.

His social worker, I will refer to as SW, said Nathan needed a lot of visual prompts to complete tasks. They have picture cards that tell them what to do when they arrive at class such as hang up coat, open homework folder, put away backpack, and that sort of thing and apparently he became agitated when there was no picture card for what to do with his gloves! They told him to put them in his backpack but he was upset there was no card to prompt him.

They said when they ask him to do 2-3 tasks that he looses focus after the first tasks but if they give him visual cues he can follow through. Interesting. The SW said we could make cards for him to use at home and that way he can refer to his cards and we don't have to "nag" him to do things. If we tell him it's time to get ready to go he could refer to a set of cards that would show the steps he needs to take to get ready such as: socks, shoes, coat, etc. They said as smart as he is he has a hard time with common sense things.

The SW also said that Nathan would prefer to speak with her and the other teacher instead of the kids and he dominates the conversation, which is nothing new to us. We already knew that. They are getting him to interact more with his peers and are trying to get him to ask them questions and have a 2 sided conversation instead of just him talking.

Once again they killed about 10,000 trees and gave us another HUGE stack of paperwork!

Nathan definitely appreciates his alone time in his room after his school. I think he needs downtime to just do his thing. They said they push him pretty hard at school and try to get him out of his comfort zone of routines.

Again they are pushing us toward the "school" route and she even said she wasn't so sure we should start him on the 1st grade curriculum in January because he will just be so far ahead...not so sure I agree.

Lots to think about and pray about! Trusting the Lord to see us through as we know He is faithful and that it says in Jeremiah He has plans for us, to give us a hope and a future and plans to prosper and not harm us.

Rebekah